I write about the past way too much

AKI wishes that I could affect the past. I have a few changes I’d like to make.

Late last night I changed my Facebook status to the above (ignore the horrible grammar). I got a few comments, so I feel the need to elaborate. At the time I posted that I meant it, mostly due to drunken reminiscing, but I am well aware that it’s a laughable conceit. I’m not a person who lives in the past or who dwell on what ifs. I’m fully aware that the events of our past are what shape our present, and I have always lived my under that tenet. But, I am a nostalgic person. For the most part, I look back fondly on the people and happenings of my personal history. And last night I was just having one of those moments where I was recalling incredible feelings and wishing that I could have that in my life right now. And I don’t think that’s such a terrible thing to do every now and again. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a cheesy 80’s movie. I don’t believe that there would be some huge improvement in my current life if only Jamie Lewis and I had been BFFs in the 6th grade. But I do sometimes wonder what the effect on my circumstances would have been if I had made different choices. I am happy with the person that I have become over these last 32 years, and I can’t see being someone else, but I am curious about who that other person might have been. In the end though, I’m satisfied with what I have. So, having said that, I’m going to change my status now.

AKI is aware that the past is history and is happy with the space I’m in. The nostalgic moment has passed. (Thanks for the love people).